Okay, you asked for it. Well, no one actually asked, but this is my blog, so like I care how you feel.
Name your poop! I’ll start.
THE POOP LIST
1. Corn poopie: self-explanatory.
2. The Machine Gun Dump – You’re just sitting there in a state of sublime peace when all of a sudden you emit a group of noisy gassy bursts that break the silence like machine gun fire. The guy in the next stall hits the floor like a combat veteran cradling his umbrella like an M16…damn commies.
3. Ghost Poopie – The kind where you feel the Poopie come out, but there’s no poopie in the toilet.
Comments
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Everything is intellectual about poop! I wasn’t being facetious, I was being serious. College is the finest place to have these outrageously entertaining and thought-provoking conversations.
that’s not a list! that’s a string!
The 5 lb poop (AKA The Watermelon): Feels like it comes out sideways with corners. Akin to giving birth through your sphincter, since you strain and push so much you break a sweat and are out of breath. Usually accompanied by a tremendous splash of toilet water on your ass. Sometimes you must check to see if you don’t have any rectal bleeding.
3. The ass-piss. Diarrhea so loose and vile it literally gushes and burns on the way out. Ew.
somehow i feel that the fact that i’m underage means i shouldn’t add to the list…
Why? Everybody poops.
Because he hasn’t had the chance to go to college and have these highly intellectual conversations.
What’s not intellectual about poop?
i’ll keep that in mind while writing applications 4 years from now.
dangerrhea: one that sneaks up on you fast and puts you in imminent danger.
heh heh "dangerrhea"
Why did I click it
In my family there is the oft referenced phantom turd… which should speak for itself….
But have any of us considered the associated symptomatic ailment… better known as the "doo-doo headache"?
Poor Blair, she has poo on the brain.
The "it was there a second ago" poop… you sit down and don’t have to go anymore.
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